Dos and Don’ts (Feb Edition)

Our monthly Dos and Don’ts are off to a great start.  We’ve received amazing views and feedback thus far.  Thank you!  We are two months down and 10 more months to go; but who’s counting!

To find out what the monthly Dos and Don’ts are all about click HERE.  In short, think of it as, every woman should have a little black dress in her closet or don’t ever leave the house without a bra on.  Seriously though.My friend Shana has so much to say!  Let’s go……

Shana:  Don’t get involved with people who have little to no friends.  Be very leery of that.  Don’t go pouring out your soul immediately.

Toya:  I definitely agree with not pouring out your soul to any Tom, Dick, or Harry.  I like to consider myself a private person so only my closest friends and those who I truly trust knows the nitty-gritty about me.  As far as getting involved with people with a few friends, that would probably be me! HAHA.  I have a ton of associates but very few friends.  I don’t get down with fake people and I believe I’ve said it before, my cut off game can be really strong.

S:  Don’t go to work everyday and not make the most of it.  Work hard, build yourself up, make moves.  You should enjoy going to work.

T:  You certainly must make “money moves” out here in these streets!  You also must put in the work too.  I don’t enjoy work everyday, but I don’t mind it for the most part.

S:  Find a pair of jeans that you love and that love your body.  When you do, buy multiples.  A good pair of jeans is equaled to a little black dress.

T:  This is a great tip.  Because nothing is worse than your favorite jeans tearing in between your thighs for us “Curvy” girls!

S:  If you don’t love yourself, no one else will.  You were made to be you and only you and you should love every inch of that!

T:  That’s a word right there!  Self love is the best love.  After we learn to love our self, release insecurities, and learn to know our worth and value as a woman, you realize that you demand respect, the RIGHT love, and you don’t settle for less.  A man will only treat you how you allow him to treat you.

S:  Don’t kiss ass.  No one likes a brown-noser.

T:  Not really sure what a brown-noser is but I’m guessing it has something to do with kissing ass.  So yea, what she said!

S:  You are going to make mistakes, everyone does.  But the biggest mistake you could ever make is not learning from those mistakes.

T:  You’ve heard the saying, “Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me!”

S:  Don’t be afraid or feel guilty for taking care of yourself or taking yourself on a date.  Life gets busier and busier everyday.  So make an appointment with yourself at least once a month to sleep in, go shopping, see a movie, or whatever it is you enjoy.

T:  I’m going to add working out to this list!  Take time to workout.  It will give you energy, it will make you feel good about yourself, it releases stress, it helps build your immune system.  Working out is the key to life.  Find something that YOU enjoy doing.  Not what everyone else enjoys.  But there is something out there for you.  Even if that mean you have to go swinging on poles!

S:  Make sure you nail polish on your nails match the policy on your toes.

T:  I’m on the fence with this one. In other words, I’m not always matchy-matchy!

S:  Don’t leave the house without making your bed in the mornings.  I can’t go to sleep in an unmade bed.  (I just really want to see what Toya has to say about this…haha)

T:  I do believe in at least pulling the covers back when you get out of the bed.  It doesn’t have to be completely made, in my opinion.  But I have read that making your bed daily does something for you.  I’m not really sure what though.

S:  Wine and coffee are both acquired taste.  As adults we should find at least one between the two enjoy.

T:  I believe everyone knows I’m a wine girl.  But if you don’t get down with either, it’s not the end of the world.

S:  Don’t talk about your “haters” because no one cares and half the time it is made up in your head.

T:  No point in wasting energy on people who don’t matter, right?

S:  Never post on social media when you are going on vacation.  Hold off until you’re back in town to post pictures, etc.

T:  Um!  This sounds good,  but it doesn’t always work that way.  Everyone shouldn’t know where you live anyway.

S:  Don’t speak about politics with friends unless they have the same beliefs as you; otherwise, you’re just looking for an unnecessary argument.

T:  I’m disagreeing with this one!  While we don’t’ share the same beliefs we have talked about politics several times especially on Twitter (Shana).  I think conversations around this are good.  We need to talk about it more instead of sweeping it under the rug.  Perhaps, someone could walk away with a little more clarity?  Roland Martin, recently stated, “We don’t understand one another because we don’t completely know one another.”  Meaning, Blacks vs. Whites,  and vice versa.  Or, Male vs. Women, and vice versa.  You can’t be afraid to state your truth.  The more we know the more we grow.  AND, the more we can see why a certain person feels the way that they do and then we can come to an agreement on how we can bridge the two sides together where we can work together in all areas of life!!!!!!!!!!!

S:  Everyone gossips.  But be sure not to say anything about someone who you wouldn’t say it to their face.

T:  Truuuuuuuuuu

S:  Don’t wash your hair everyday.  It is actually really bad for your scalp.  The scalp needs the oils.  I’ve trained my hair to only need washing twice a week.

T:  Ma’am!  Black people don’t wash their hair everyday or twice a week.  More like once every two weeks.  But when I’m rocking my curls it’s more like every other day! Ha.

Which one resonates with you the most?  Or which one just seems utterly ridiculous to you?  Any and all feedback is welcomed.

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Shana lives in VA with her husband and daughter.

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