Protecting our Daughters!

I remember growing up and often feeling like my sister and I really couldn’t do as much as our friends or cousins did.  There were times when we would beg and plead to stay over someone’s house and the answer was always, NO!  Eventually we got use to the word NO and stop asking to stay places or to even go certain places.  My mother always stated that our friends could come visit us and that was it.  I really didn’t understand why at the time but that was our life.

Just so we are clear, I come from a two parent home, but whatever momma said is what the final rule was.  If we ever tried to out talk my mother all she had to do was say my daddy’s name and my dad would give us a look, as if to say, you heard what your momma said! LOL

Now that I’m older, I understand my mother’s logic quite well and I’m actually very thankful that such guidelines were in place.  I now know that my mother was protecting me from being exposed to potential situations I had no business being in at such a young age.  I also realize that my parents only wanted what was best for my sister and me.

What it boils down to is, a person doesn’t know what goes on at another person’s house behind closed doors.  Not saying that everyone is doing bad things but you just don’t know.  Another parent might have rules that are totally different from what are currently in place at your house.  It’s better to not have a child placed in an environment that could be totally foreign to them.

All of this came to mind after I was watching the “Surviving R. Kelly” docuseries that recently aired on Lifetime.  In case you didn’t watch the series, this man has preyed on younger girls for most of his music career causing mental, physical, and sexual abuse to young girls and women as they told their personal stories.  The docuseries highlighted his actions from a young child all the way up to today–where it is said that he had a sex cult.  I watched the show with my daughter as it was very hard to do so, but being that I too, have a 14 year old child, I felt it was necessary and important.

I remember listening to him in heavy rotation as a teenager, not really knowing or putting two and two together.  Now when I think about some of the songs that he made they seem to all be centered on him targeting young naïve children.  Songs like Bump & Grind, and the lyrics stating “His mind is telling him no…but his body is telling him yes!”  Imagine him, as a 28 year old man singing this to a 14  year old girl.

What’s even more disgusting are the parents who act like they couldn’t do anything to protect their children.  I remember listening to the show and this one couple stating that their child who was 14 at the time, threatened them if they didn’t let her go away with R. Kelly.

Really!

Are you kidding me?

Who’s the parent and who’s the adult in this situation?

I wish my daughter would come to me and tell me she’s running off with some guy and if I don’t let her she’s going to threaten me.  Honey, you better send all your threats then because my number one mission and goal is to always protect my child whether she likes it or not.  I hate to see parents not protecting their children and just letting them do whatever they want.  It’s time for us to take back the parent role in our households.  I tell my daughter all the time, you will thank me when you get older and that’s that.

I also believe that it is our responsibility to not only protect our daughters but to also have the best interest of other children that may cross our paths at heart.  During this R. Kelly docuseries so many people were helping and assisting him with getting way with being a predator and no one ever stood up for these young girls.  No one came to their rescue.  No one had enough balls to tell R. Kelly NO!  They were all smitten by his fame and celebrity lifestyle that they allowed a grown man to take advantage of innocent girls.

So the current question floating around social media is can you separate the artist from art?  I believe in this instance, there is no way to separate the two.  Time after time he wrote and sung songs that were centered on having sex with young girls and WE as a culture have ignored every single solitary sign that has come across our TV’s and radio. It’s time that we do better.  We can start by not listening to his music!

I want to publicly ask my generation to stop listening to R. Kelly’s music as protecting our daughters should be more important than listening to his music.  How about we not give him wings so that he can fly any more.  How about we step in the name of love and protect our daughters.   Lets also teach our daughters the importance of self worth and self love.  That no man should ever be able to take their power or voice away from them.

LETS PROTECT OUR DAUGHTERS.  YOUNG BLACK GIRLS ARE IMPORTANT TOO!

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3 thoughts on “Protecting our Daughters!

  1. Couldn’t agree more Toya! It is beyond disgusting what he did! And as much as my daughter detests listening to me talk about stuff like this…it is so important to get the word across to them. I recently had a conversation with her about trafficking “OMG she would have rather cut off her arm that continue to listen to me”. My mom talked about these uncomfortable things to me and I’m passing it along….every mom should do the same.

    Liked by 1 person

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