Brick by Brick

When a relationship doesn’t pan out to be what we expect it to be or what our version of a particular relationship should look like we begin to build mental walls.  The walls that we build are set into place brick by brick; because while we hope the relationship has potential we don’t want to personally set ourselves up for failure.  At best, we are trying to protect the heart.

I believe this to be true for all relationships.  Whether it’s a romantic relationship, a friendship, family, business, or casual. I’ve always believed that relationships are two-way streets.  A relationship CANNOT survive with just one person putting in all the work all the time.

Do I think that social media has strengthen any of our relationships?

I most certainly do not.

In fact, I believe that social media has done more harm to relationships than it has good.  We tend to have a front row seat into people’s everyday life which causes many of us to halt our personal connections with people outside of social media. Something many of us take for granted.

If there is no connection there is no relationship.

But the icing on the cake that causes the most damage to a relationship is when a person chooses to no longer be associated with you.  When a person feed you lies but then their actions tell another story.  When a person treat you as if you are so insignificant in their life, that’s when the wall starts to form.  And over time those walls begin to get taller and taller.  Before you know it, walls are now being placed in front of other walls making the center of the heart that much harder to get to.

white ceramic wall tile beside red concrete bricks
Just imagine my heart behind this wall!

While it may hurt, you continue to go on with your life, and eventually you take on a mental mindset of, “it is what it is.”  No one is willing to make the first step so therefore you continue about life as if that person really doesn’t exist.  Because what once was is now no longer.  The little relationship that was there has now ran its course.  The memories are almost nonexistent.

I must be honest, depending on the relationship the harder it may be to not feel some kinda way but it’s important to not let someone else’s actions deter you from living your best life.  At the end of the day it’s really not worth the headache.  It’s also important to remember that each person that enters your life is there for a reason and/or a season and sometimes their time just may be up. Besides, who said we couldn’t love people from afar?

Here are two different ways you could handle this situation:

1. What if we made a decision to give our battle to the Lord to fight? You know he can carry our burdens and fight any battle we choose to give to Him. It’s all about surrendering and allowing God to fill the empty void that may be in our hearts from any failed relationship.  In the end, I believe this is the better way to handle these type of situations.  At least this way, perhaps at some point, there can be some room left for remediation.  Anything can happen with the result of prayer!

2. You can decide to just be completely done with the situation.  You may feel that a person who makes a conscious choice each and every day to cut off the important people in their life should keep that same energy when their life crumbles.

I’d like to hope that many of us would choose option 1 but these are personal decisions that we each have to make at some point in our lives.  I also believe that by choosing option 1 that we are freeing ourselves and leaving room in our hearts to still receive.

The only downside I can see from creating mental barriers is the fact that you’ll start to block out the good people in your life or potential good people who may be coming into your life. You’ll always feel that people are out to get you or do you wrong. This is usually very far from the truth but at this point you’ve adopted this type of mindset.

I’m always choosing LOVE! 💕  I’ve learned that I can love from afar.  I’ve also learned that there is nothing wrong with saying, Thank You—Next!  (Thanks Ariana Grande)

Are you ready to knock down those mental brick walls this year? Are you ready to replace bricks with LOVE? Which option would you go with? One or two?

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3 thoughts on “Brick by Brick

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